 Spring has sprung and the trees are in full bloom, right along with the amount of engagements, pregnancy announcements, weddings, and people buying their first houses. It's easy during these times to find yourself comparing where you're at with where others are at in their lives, and that's when it's easy to fall into trouble. Last night I was talking to my friend about how easy it is to get frustrated with the timing of our lives.. why things might not be happening that are happening in others lives. Social media makes it so easy to show others what's going on and then we're kinda forced to see it, depending on the amount of time you and your friends share on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, etc... your conversations will probably start to circle around "oh, did you see so and so is dating her now.. Oh! Did you see that she's pregnant... oh my gosh, they just got engaged this weekend--SO CUTE!... Man, did you see how much weight she's lost, I wish I could look like that. They got their own place together and it's adorable. " We start to spend more and more time caught up in others peoples lives and comparing what they have (#goals), that we miss out on the precious life right in front of us. How many minutes a day do we spend looking at others peoples profiles, comparing their lives, their characteristics, and their seemingly awesome lifestyle to our own, then questioning why God isn't making that happen in our life? Probably a little too much if we're honest with ourselves. Last night I realized that today was going to be the first day of May. I'm not quite sure where the time goes, but it was after we were talking about all of the engagements over the past weekend, that it got me thinking... Man, i'm one more month closer to 25 and my life is still all over the place. I remember when I was younger, I had it planned out in my head that by 25, I wanted to have a good job and be married and maybe even be thinking about children. If only I could tell little twelve year old me that that wouldn't be the plan- nope, not even close at all. The truth is, my life is crazy and i'm absolutely nowhere near that little dream I had in my head. Since graduation, I've traveled and moved around more than I haven't. I've had more than a handful of different jobs, and I'm still figuring it all out. I don't have my own place, I third wheel more with my brother and his girlfriend than actually going on dates, and I don't have the "full-time" job that everyone expects you to get after you graduate college. What i've realized though along the journey is this.. This is my life. It might seem chaotic and not make sense to some, but to me, it's the life that I'm supposed to be living. Sure I might not have it all planned out, but I know that my God does, and that I'm right where He wants me. I don't make decisions out of haste and hope it's the right one.. I spend time praying about it and asking others to pray for me, and only then do I try to make the decision that I feel God is laying on my heart. The journey isn't all black and white and straight and narrow.. the truth is, there are lots of twists and turns, and bright and dark colors that intermix and blend to make all of our stories unique-- that mold us and shape and break and heal us into the person that we're made to be. God has led me in the past and will continue to direct my steps for a purpose, and I might not know these purposes today or even next month, but one day, it will all make perfect sense. I might not be married or engaged or even dating, have my own place, or have a full-time job like 80% of the people my age are doing, but you know what, there's beauty in that because there's beauty in living in the present moment with the people and places and opportunities that God puts in your life. It's the start of a new month and personally, I want to use the first day of this month to limit myself. To limit the amount of time I spend comparing my life, where I'm at in my "life plan," my body, my lifestyle, any part of who I am- to those around me. I'm alive and I'm breathing, so I'm able.. Able to be the person that God created me to be, able to love others fiercely, able to be kind, able to do good. Able to make the conscious decision to live my life and not get caught up in who I'm not and who I think the world thinks I should be. How will you use your days? Will you try to live up to the expectations of other people that you think you need to, or will you live your life knowing that you're loved, valuable, and perfect just the way you are-- and where you're at in life is exactly the spot that you're meant to be. It will all come together eventually- everything you've been hoping for, wishing, and praying about, and as hard as it is to be patient, it will all be well worth it. Because God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good. Heard this song on the radio on my way to the coffee shop I was coming to write this and it reinforced this truth-- God is gooooooood.
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