Cheers to Four Years & a Lifetime

Do you ever wonder what something will feel like, and you think you know how it's going to feel and how it's going to happen, but then God just goes and blows your mind and it's nothing like you expected, but so much more than you could have imagined?

I have, plenty of times. One of those things we'd imagined was the day that my brother would propose. We knew it was coming, they just celebrated their four year anniversary last week and there had been talks about a wedding, but nothing set in stone.. However, Friday night the wedding dreams became a reality when my brother got down on one knee on a dinner cruise in Chicago and asked her to marry him.

The amount of emotions I feel is insane, so I can only imagine how excited and happy they are right now. It goes from I can't stop smiling, to tearing up at the most random things. I drove home Saturday to see them and on my drive back, I had one of those playlists that Spotify makes for you playing, and it seemed like every other song I was getting tears in my eyes. Not to mention at breakfast, me and Christen sat there and probably looked like goofs because we'd randomly almost cry.

Okay, so I'm a little excited. It seems like just yesterday, little squeaker sent me a message on Facebook about two weeks after they started hanging out saying that she was glad that him and I were close and how much she cared about him. Fast forward to her becoming my best friend that probably knows me better than I know myself. 

It hasn't always been an easy road. I've lived with her for a year, I've grown up beside him. I've seen or heard about the highs and the lows. He's my brother and best friend, and she's my soon to be sister best friend. They've let me tag along as a third wheel more times than I can count on my hands and feet, and through it all, I've seen them grow and love and I've learned so much not only about love, but about life and faith and hope. 

Through these two amazing amazing people, there are four things that stick out to me. We'll call it four years for four main lessons.

• Patience. I'm at a point in my life where it's really hard to be patient. There's a lot of things I'm being patient with, and it's frustrating sometimes. They know this and our group chat of very sarcastic remarks makes it pretty evident. Particularly when other people give their opinions about where they are or where they think I should be. No I'm not engaged, married, or having a child. I'm just me. Finding my way in this big world, seeking not what I think is best for me, but what and who God created for me. I know patience was tough for them. They did long distance for a couple years and they dated for four years before getting engaged. Wouldn't it be hard to be patient for something you know is probably going to happen, so why can't it happen already? They've been patient for being close in distance, finding their career paths, in trusting what God has in store for them. It's not even close to rainbows and butterflies and there's been times when life caused big changes, but the one thing that stayed the same is their love for one another. When we think we know the right timing but God has another plan.. it turns out His plan is much mightier and so much better than our own. Because of that, I know that whatever I'm waiting for, for all of the hopes and dreams and ideas in my head, I know the wait may be frustrating and I might feel defeated sometimes, but the wait is well well worth it. Christen waited (for what seemed like ever) and this moment, this time in her life is so sweet and so exciting, and she'll tell you a million times that God is faithful and it's so much sweeter than we can even imagine. 

• Honesty. Sometimes we have to tell people things they don't want to hear. Sometimes we have to hurt those we love by being truthful with what's going on. Even if it hurts, even if we want to shut our eyes and just avoid it, that's really not how life works. Would a relationship work if only half of the couple was being honest in what they were doing, how they were feeling? Sure, for a little bit maybe. Only long enough for the truth to come out. There are times we want to just say everything's okay because we don't want to worry someone or because we are just in a weird mood and we know we'll get over it, but other times there might be something really bothering you that you need to get out. Sometimes it seems way worse in your head, so when you actually do decide to be honest about it and talk, it seems so much more bearable. Without honesty, without trust, in my eyes, there really isn't much. The truth might cause some pain, but I'd rather be hurt with the truth than comforted by a lie, hands down, any day. Times will get tough, one or the other will be a jerk, there will be days when you are super annoyed and days you can't get enough of each other. I've learned through anything, the key is always honesty. If you have that and you have a relationship built on trust and you can be open with one another, things in life don't seem as overwhelming and intimidating. I've seen the honesty, I've seen the results of being honest with one another, and what I see because of this, is a relationship centered on God, centered on the truth. It might not be easy all of the time, but with this foundation, God can work through them in so many ways, helping them grow together and strengthen their relationship. Just like He can do for all of us.

• Persistence. The excitement of a new relationship can fade over time, and oftentimes it becomes a routine. We wake up, say good morning, rush off to work, then reconnect after. We become comfortable watching movies at night and laying around not doing much of anything. Sure, it's fun sometimes, but other times, you wish you still had that excitement that came with the beginning of something new. Where'd the spark and fun go? Well, through four years of dating, I've been able to see their love and adventure continue to grow. As a young couple or even older couple, it doesn't have to be extreme and expensive. They venture to state parks, do things outside, and take little roadtrips. Things that don't cost much, but give them quality time together- to laugh, enjoy one another's company, and make memories together. Sure there are times when they do nothing, but I love seeing the little ways that they surprise one another every now and then. Whether it be home-baked goodies or a surprise date night, they still pursue one another and seek out new ways to make each other's day and make sure they know they're thinking of one another and want to show their love. It makes my heart so happy to see that there still are some people in our generation that do want to do the little things, that want to put the effort in, because it's the littlest things that make such a difference. Be persistent, don't let your feelings dwindle down after three months. Don't stop showing you care, because even the littlest thing that shows a hint of emotion will go much longer than you can imagine.

• Selflessness. These two are both the sweetest people with the biggest hearts. I'm not just saying that because I love them, I'm saying it because it's true. They want to help people, they want to make people feel loved and valued. They welcome in strangers, they reach out to the hurting. They've dropped what they were doing more than once when I needed them and when others have needed them. They put others before themselves, and they love with open arms. They've been such a positive role model as both individuals and a couple for the type of person I want to be and for the type of relationship I someday want to have. I can't say enough good things about them, and I'm thankful for the many many times they've welcomed me in to tag along on their dates and in on their lives. Without complaint, without hesitation, they are there for their family, for their friends, and their kind hearts have made such a difference in so many lives.

Four years have flown by, and through this time I've learned so much from the two of you. That love is patient, love is kind,  and love never fails. How to laugh, how to love, how to cook better (ahahaha), how to talk in dumb accents, and how to not give up when life gets tough. I wouldn't be the person I am today without the influence of you two, and I'm so thankful that God brought you, Christen, into our lives and that I can officially call you my sister (even though we've been doing it for years). For all the life lessons, for all the laughs, for all the sarcastic remarks, eye rolls, and smirks. I'm so excited to see God work in you as a married couple. Oh. AHHHH. Congratulations, you two. I love you.