SweetTea by the Tree
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Strivin & Smilin

4/26/2016

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I'm a super softy. I feel things deeply. I think about things more often than I should. I think about people more than I should. And on top of it, I don't just ponder all of that for situations involving me. That'd be crazy, but sometimes it's even crazier that I feel that always for every person I come across. 

Stranger on the street looking lost or sad? How can I not wonder what they're going through and want to ask them and tell them that everything will be okay? A friend who's super happy about something, of course I get excited. Watching someone lose the one they love after 58 years, well you might as well cue the tears now.

It's not a bad thing.. Yeah, I'll admit I do have alot of emotions and I care alot about pretty much anyone and everyone. Is that a blessing or a curse? Well, I guess that depends on the day. 

The past 2 weeks that's all heightened, and now I walk around and feel like a little kid. I look in awe at the trees blossoming. I get tears in my eyes as my niece takes me out to the "garden" to plant a sunflower seed (yes, like the kind you eat) because she wants the flower to grow. The sun set changing the clouds in the sky a million different colors, reminding me that even if life gets a little cloudy, God will use it to make it something beautiful, just like he makes the clouds look beautiful. 

Perspective has everything to do with it. If you're going through something tough, it's going to seem like the worst thing in the world. Unless you look at it differently. Don't look at it from our perspective, but look up and outside of it, and see the bigger picture. I spent the past week watching a loved one slowly deteriorate day by day and eventually leave to be in heaven. His wife, his children there each day, dreading the day they'd have to say goodbye. 

It literally broke my heart into a million pieces. Just imagining what they feel, and feeling all of my emotions on top of that. Knowing that his wife had been by his side for 58 years and thinking of all of the life that they'd been through. The good times, the bad times, the happy and the sad.. whatever they were going through, they stuck together through it all. Trying to imagine what'd it be like to spend 58 years beside someone, and then not be able to tell them stories from the day or share dinner with them at night, cuddle up next beside them and fall asleep together anymore. 

It was one of the hardest things I've been through, but at the same time, I found new strength and hope. Sure he's out of our world for now, but one day, we'll all be together again in a place where there aren't any aches, pain or tears. How awesome will that be?

He worked so hard his whole life on our family farm, so he left me with those values instilled in me, that I strive to carry out each day. To spend my life working hard to be the best that I can be, and to impact the lives of those around me. To surround myself with people like him, to be happy doing what I love and loving what I do. Some of my friends are like that, absolutely love what they do. It makes my heart so full just sitting and listening to them talk about their days and what work they did. And just like him, they inspire me, every day to keep striving to find what makes me happy and go after it with everything in me.

He loved his wife and showed us what true love is. I know what that looks like and have that hope for the future, that I can be that kind of wife who sticks by her husband. That loves him, is there for him, and doesn't ever give up. That'll be patient, kind, goofy, loving, and will do whatever I can to bring him smiles and laughter. (I mean, if you've ever lived with me, you should know that there's never a dull moment-- at any given time i'm bound to break out a princess guitar and sing songs in a southern accent).

It's taught me the value of time with loved ones and friends. One morning I was driving to work, and the next moment, everything changed. We don't ever know when our time with someone will be up. I try to live out everyday with that perspective, because then I appreciate time and the moments and memories more. 

Tough times don't last, but you will. Use them as a lesson to make you a better, stronger, and more appreciative person. It's all temporary- everything about this life. We're only here for a short time, but we have such a brighter life ahead of us. Don't get bogged down on the struggles of today, but remember, the sun's always going to shine through. It'll poke through the cracks, and eventually shine through like a sunrise coming up over the horizon out in the middle of nowhere.


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love always hopes

4/10/2016

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Every time lately that I log on social media, there seems to be another post for one of the following three things.. An engagement, a pregnancy announcement, or a wedding. I guess I'm getting to that age when it's just common for those things to happen. It's such an exciting time, and it gets me all excited seeing friends find the person that they'll marry and start planning their lives together. It gets me excited, thinking of the day that I'll come across that person that God created for me.

We have a group chat with my friends from back home, and the other day we were talking about guys after one of them had an encounter with one. What is affection, and do couples even couple anymore? Pretty logical questions given our society's values and the trends going on. It makes me so sad for the younger generations that they grow up seeing relationships how they are these days. We've begun to settle. To settle for people that don't respect us or treat us right. But we think that we're stuck and we don't deserve better. That this is all we really deserve, because we're nothing special. 

Wrong. 

You deserve more. 

You deserve someone who appreciates you. Respects you. Makes you smile. Trusts you. Loves you, and only you. Who makes you laughs, inspires you, encourages you, works hard and is motivated. The person that when something happens, good or bad, is the first person you want to tell.

This morning we were getting in the car for church and I opened the car door for my  niece. We got in, and I told them.. Lesson of the day. Make sure the guy always opens the doors for you. I don't care if it's a car door, a door to a restaurant, or the door to your backdoor. 

You deserve to be respected. Gentlemen always did it back in the olden days, and there's no reason that they shouldn't do it every now and then now. They might only be 6, 7 and 12, but they can't ever be too young to know that they're loved and deserve the best. 

There's one relationship that I've had the opportunity to see grow throughout the past few years, one that is so full of joy, love and respect. One that has been such a powerful example to me, and since it's national sibling day, I'll go ahead and share that since it just so happens to be my brother. 

Brothers. The people who make us girls tough, but teach us how to love. That run around outside, argue with you, teach you all the tomboy ways of life. From playing outside in the barns, to study dates, then coffee and breakfasts, so much has changed over the years, but still things never change.

They're pranksters, they make you laugh, they drive you crazy, but at the end of the day, I know I sure as heck wouldn't be who I am today without mine. He's the hardest working person I know. There isn't a day that I talk to him that he isn't either studying or working, yet he always take the time to be a loving, thoughtful, caring, encouraging, boyfriend, son, and brother. 

Thank you. Thank you for being an example to me. For working hard and dreaming big. You inspire me to go after my dreams, even if they're ever-changing, even if I don't know what some of those might be. Seeing you grow into the young man that you are and being lucky enough to be there beside you through it all has been my favorite times. For encouraging me, always making me laugh, and having such a thoughtful heart. 

For being a boyfriend that is respectful, encouraging, faithful, sweet, the list goes on. You've had your ups and downs, but you've stuck together through it all. A relationship like yours is what most girls dream of having, and I'm so thankful to be able to see that there are still people out there that put God first, that are genuine and loving.

You laugh together, you're so sarcastic, but still you get through the tough times together. You're my favorite couple, and since the time you first started dating in high school and Christen messaged me, I knew there was something special there, and it's been amazing to see grow the past few years. Whether you're doing nothing together or out hiking and being adventurous, you're just so happy to be together. Just seeing you holding hands, or more often than not, being sarcastic and pestering each other, anyone can see how much you care about each other. I'm thankful for your example, for your encouragement, and for the hope that you give everyone. There are still a such thing as relationships that survive and prosper and grow, and your relationship is just that.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

God's timing is always perfect timing. As is the people He places in your life. We might pray He'd hurry it up sometimes, but patience is key, because it'll happen when it's supposed to. If you're still searching for that person in your life, he or she is out there. Have faith, pray for him or her, and know that God has created someone just for you. Don't settle for less than you deserve because you're lonely and tired of waiting. It's the waiting that isn't fun, but in the end, is completely worth it.







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Pause the noise

4/3/2016

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There's something about Sundays. It's the beginning of a new week, it's a Sunday bumday, it's a Sunday funday, it's really anything you make of it. 

I don't know why Sunday's always get me thinking, but they do. They just give me all sorts of feels, and it never fails.  I always miss home the most on Sundays.  I think it's because there's just something about curling up on my own couch with my family and watching movies and taking an afternoon nap, going to lunch with the grandparents, and just being around everyone while they finally take a small break from the crazy everyday work schedules. 

I missed it when I was away at school, while I was on the road last summer, and it still holds true today. Maybe it's because Sunday's are usually the only day I actually will have time to just sit and not have anything to do, so there's ample time to sit and ponder. I usually like to go drive around, find some country roads and just turn up my music and drive. It's been a freezing cold, dreary day so I can't say that I've done that, but church today and just life in general has got me thinking about being content and happy in life. 

The message was about being unsatisfied in life, and how we're always striving for things that we think we need to make us happy. The more I got to thinking about it, the more I realize how true it is. In a world so dominated by social media and the internet and cell phones, it's become habitual to take a photo and share it with family and friends. It takes five seconds to take a snapchat and set it as your story so you can keep your friends posted on what you're doing throughout the day. 

It's more common than not to share where we're at, what we're doing, post pictures, add albums, share exciting news, and ask for prayers. It's so convenient because it doesn't take much to share something and have it out there for many eyes to see. It's good for advice, questions, advertising events, just about anything. 

What's that really doing to us though? We see what everyone else is doing, who's with who, who's getting engaged, who's having babies, who's dating who, who's going where, we see multiple aspects to everyone's lives. It gets tricky because even though we don't realize it, we might start to compare our lives to those we see online. 

We start to wonder why we can't travel like this person, or have a relationship like that couple, wonder why our life seems so "boring," even though there's nothing wrong with it at all. It's easy to fall into that trap. So how do we keep from doing that?

Lately, I've been feeling really thankful. My heart's just been super full of joy, and I wake up feeling like I can do something to make a difference somehow. It's a process though, some days are harder and I get down and frustrated and sad and I have to remember a few things. I'm alive, I'm healthy, I have a job, a place to stay, a loving family, long-distance friendships that always make me laugh, and friends here that are great, always make me laugh and forget that I'm missing everyone else.

I think our thoughts, our willpower over our thoughts, just maintaining a grateful heart has a lot to do with being content. Even though we see others with things we might want, there might be goals in life we haven't reached yet, people we want in our lives that maybe just aren't supposed to be, whatever the case may be.. We get frustrated, we question why something isn't happening, or when the time will finally come for other things to take place in our lives.  

We have to pause and look around. Remember what we do have, appreciate the times and blessings we've had in the past, and pray about the future. Everything we have, we have for a reason. The people in our lives, their paths have crossed ours for a reason. Maybe it's only for a short while, while others will be in your life for years to come. Sometimes we might disagree with the length of time we get with some. Wouldn't it be convenient if we could see a timer somehow of how much time we have left with someone?

How would we live our lives differently if we knew that? Would we be a little more thankful, appreciative, helpful, and loving, or would we say oh there's this much time left, I can wait a little while to show you that I appreciate you being in my life? 

Shouldn't we live our everyday lives as if we only had today? In all honesty, we have no idea how long we do have. All we have is right now. So do we want to spend our lives being envious of what we see around us, or do we spend it looking around and acknowledging what we do have.. Treating a friend to lunch, sending a handwritten letter to someone thanking them for being in your life, being present where you are instead of being absorbed with what you don't have and what others do.

That's the key thing that I've come to realize the past few months. Sure it freaks me out that I'm going to be 24 this year, and life's been nothing but a crazy adventure the past year. There's been ups and downs, highs and lows, but with it i've found something that I can count on every moment of every day.

I've found peace, a deep happiness and appreciation for life and the people in it. Most days my heart just feels like it could explode from all of the happiness and love I want to share with others.. Like, would it be weird if I just went around hugging people and telling them that I love them and appreciate them and I'm thankful for them being a part of my life? All I want to do is make people laugh, make them realize that they're one of a kind, and that they do indeed matter, that they deserve true happiness. It's the truth. And if you're reading this, just know that you've impacted my life in some way and I'm forever grateful for you. 

So next time you get to scrolling through your newsfeed and wonder when you'll get your next promotion, when you'll make some more money, when you'll find a relationship like the couple that just got engaged, etc.. just pause. Think about it a different way. Be happy for those in your life and what they have. Be thankful that you can be there for them, support them, encourage them and cheer them on. Look around at your life, and just know that a God who created this whole wide world also created you. 

He knew every single characteristic of you long before you were born. He knew what your life was going to look like, what decisions you'd make, how you'd live your life. He knew what you'd struggle with, and what you'd be amazing at. You're who you are for a reason. Some things might not always make sense, but there's a reason behind it. It makes us who we are and into the person we're meant to be. 

Let's not get lost in the noise of our everyday lives and forget why we're here. Let's love more, compare our lives less. Let's be happy, thankful, loving, and make the world a little brighter than it is. It's pretty dark and crazy scary out there at times, and the world could use a whole lot more of people who just bring a certain kind of joy to those around them. 

Try thinking of 3 things each night that you were thankful for throughout that day. Then, slowly over time, maybe you'll begin to realize throughout the day how truly blessed you are. It's something I started doing, and it's altered my perspectives on so many things. This life is precious, as are those around us. It goes much too fast, so let's not waste it wishing it were different, let's embrace it, love it, be grateful for it. 







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